Thursday, January 12, 2012

Nervous or neurotic?

I'm trying to decide what the difference is between an appropriate level of nervousness and simply neurotic. My birthday is coming up, so I asked my cousin if she can watch Desmond on Saturday night while Chris and I see a movie. Today I went online to purchase tickets and saw that the movies I want to see play at times that will mean leaving the house before I get Desmond down for the night. I'm sure my cousin, a grown woman who is also a pediatric nurse at a children's hospital, can handle rocking a 4-month-old to sleep and putting him in his crib for the night, but the idea of it made me so anxious. Voice ringing like a siren in my head at seeing movie times: Desmond will freak out  he is not comforted to sleep in exactly the way that I comfort him and he will stay awake howling all night, feeling miserable, sad and abandoned. So I bought tickets to a later movie that I'm not as interested in seeing. So much for keeping my perspective and staying level.

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